Let it Rain...

Music: Sarah Brightman

Another week. Time certainly is a fickle thing - there are times where it seems to just DDDDDDDRRRRRAAAAGGGG on and on, ad nauseam. Then, of course, there are the times in which it flies by way too quickly. It can get a bit confusing sometimes and I don't think I'll ever get used to it.

I think I'm FINALLY (knock on wood) back to normal, now. I just can't afford, in any sense of the word, to get sick anymore for a while. It just can't happen if I'm to be productive. Ugh. But, I'm thankful I have a good immune system and can usually bounce back rather quickly, with the help of drugs. I do believe in some natural remedies, but quite honestly, if there's a quicker, more effective way to solve a problem, then I'm all for it, provided the side effects aren't really awful.

As I listen to Sarah Brightman, I'm always amused and quite a fan of her versatility. Even within the same song, she can go from a pop sound to a classical sound, vocally. I think it's amazing, as so many other singers seem to be locked into one thing or another, where Sarah seems so comfortable bouncing back and forth. I hope to achieve the same thing someday with my own music and artistry. Why be in a box?

School is starting soon. I was browsing through some of the performance opportunities and student groups earlier and was getting really excited. I'd really like to get into some sort of vocal group again, as I really miss singing on a regular basis. Some of the a capella groups look really interesting, as well as the traditional glee club. I'm also wondering what opportunities I can find for advancing my music technology knowledge and getting more done on my demo. There is the school "label," something like M records or the like, so perhaps there's an open door there? I just need to get this thing done and out the door. However, what may help in the near future is the fact that the UM computer store has Logic Studio at a REALLY NICE price...like, w/in my budget...oh so tempting. But, yes. This demo project is close to being done - I can feel it. I have some vocals to record, some extra parts to put in and maybe one or 2 more pieces to record. Goal is before the holidays. Then, off to as many people I can think of that have some sort of input in the music business...

(Music change to Celine Dion)

I'm finding myself spending A LOT of time @ the coffeeshop these days. I'm thinking it's a combination of having my own time, around people, but without having to interact, the nice decor, freezing cold temperatures (yes, I LOVE it that cold - so comfy when your car doesn't have AC anymore), very attractive baristas, and free internet. Not to mention the drinks are good. But, I just feel so...in touch with myself sometimes. Sure, I can't really work on recording or writing much, or really listen to music (overhead music is too loud), but I can use the internet, work on documents and Finale, all without any interruptions, save for the occasional pee break. It's great. I wish I had more time on my own without anyone else bugging me.

So, I've done quite a few quintet arrangements over the last months. Like, 16!! I mean, that's a lot. Currently, I'm working on "Morceau de Salon, Op. 228" by Kalliwoda and Pasculli's concerto on themes of "La Favorita." Yes, they're oboe pieces, but I think they've got a lot to offer in these arrangements. Sometimes the piano parts can get hard to condense (see Kalliwoda...), but it's a good challenge. I've found that this is a lot of fun, a good hobby, and is helping to expand our repertoire, particularly on the pop side.

I'm getting so tired of my job. I'm okay once I get started, but sometimes everyone just bugs the fuck out of me (save for Mom and Dad). It's like, just let me do my thing. It would help if certain people would work, too, but whatev. I've been getting weird vibes from others, too, but I'm starting to not care. I'm approachable and if you've got a problem, you better come talk to me because I'm not going to guess. I don't have time or energy for that. Just get over yourself and talk to me. I'm just glad I'm not quitting completely, but this full-time thing is getting old. Underpaid and overworked for what I think is too much. Sure, I agreed to it in the beginning, but I had no idea what was really going on. What WILL they do w/out me on a regular basis after they've had me is going to be interesting. Gah.

(Music change to Cher)

Gay. Gay. Gay. Sometimes I feel really gay, other times, not so much. I just wish it was easier to tell with other people, in general. I don't have a very good gaydar, which sucks (no pun). As I've said before, I just think there aren't any gays around here, or not any my age that I would want to hang with, anyway. Oy. If I could just meet someone with similar interests, "morals," ideas, etc., that would be great. It would be nice to know for a while that I'm not crazy and that there are some others who think like I do, regardless of how unique I am.

Ugh. It's 12:30 and I'm not even really sleepy. I should be in bed right now, but I'm too involved in writing here and doing other stuff. I didn't get to practice today like I'd planned, but I did get some good reed time in. So, I guess it's a compromise. I just hope I can get these damn excerpts. It doesn't help that I feel strangely out of shape right now. Like, my endurance feels shot lately, even though I haven't really changed my playing habits. I'm thinking it's a reed thing, but we'll see. Hopefully I can get it back. I really need to start practicing my ass off with not only excerpts, but with the Gillet music, as well as my recital music...Pasculli is almost there; just some technical things to clean up and solidify. It's coming along nicely. If I could just get past this stupid mental block about practicing and pride. Maybe a trip to Gretchen for some neurofeedback is in order...

(Music change to Enya)

Okay, I think I'm done brain-dumping for now...